imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize