just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
