Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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