if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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