Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We left an ass print on the piano.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
im on a boat
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