when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
