Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
You're a waste of cheezeits
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
