So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Randomize
