hotel room ftw
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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