Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
