"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
MIDGETS
????
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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