I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Randomize
