just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Randomize
