youre lurking in front of me
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
