420 ftw
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize