so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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