Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
