We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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