We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
