what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize