Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
