i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize