she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Randomize
