I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize