I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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