Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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