Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
there was a trapeze. enough said
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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