Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
