wanna go halves on a baby?
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
