the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
