It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
