God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
