Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
