Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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