i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
