drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize