i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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