You're completely useless in the revolution.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
