I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
