where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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