Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
