Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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