If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
