I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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