What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
