erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
