You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
