I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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