Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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