Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
